well, i've never heard cabarete described as 'too sanitized' - just a joke. actually, i do understand what you mean. while cabarete is a very busy town, and is over-run with tourists, it does sort of have it's own unique character. most of the hotels are small to medium size, and it definitely doesn't have the 'manufactured' or 'disney world' feel that, say, aruba has.
for the reasons discussed, cabarete doesn't fit my description of a 'romantic' spot - but it may fit yours.
from your description of yourself and your interests, the key to an enjoyable cabarete vacation would be to get out of cabarete and into the countryside in the mornings, and sail in the afternoon. this makes sense because the wind only comes up at about 1:00 pm anyway.
the countryside is quite beautiful, and is accessible by bike and horse. it does take a little bit of effort to get beyond the tourist sites though. it is possible to see , within horseback riding distance, people living lives barely touched by modern conveniences.
because you have persisted this long, i will mention my website with a description of cabarete and the windsurfing there.
http://www.jfeehan.net/Cabarete/cabarete.html
(it is down for 'maintenance' but shold be up within a few hours.) i will soon put some photos there, and i have a few from the countryside around cabarete.